Tag: lifeexperiences

Posted on in Quoting Carma, Uncategorized

Lessons by Carma- 2021

2021 helped us master the skills of resilience, perseverance and sustainability. Trying to assemble these skills might have been the need of the hour considering the new norm of the pandemic, but it has definitely contributed to the art of survival.

When you look back, you would remember those that greatly contributed to your well-being. Let us also take a look at the lessons that you might have skipped or left unnoticed.

Lessons by Carma

#1 Overreaction= rejection of your initial gut feeling

Consider an incident in which you might have overreacted. Now, think deeply, was it really necessary? We often tend to ignore the first gut feeling that comes to our minds. Self-esteem issues, need for assurance, wanting to be liked, all these might account to a few reasons that make you deny your instant gut feeling. When you look back, you will realize that most of the time your gut feeling was always right.

Your overreaction was a product of you conflicting your gut, trying to prove a contradicting point or trying to sugar-coat the obvious. This leads to extreme dissatisfaction and may affect your overall well-being. We often tend to fight our gut to paint a positive picture instead of seeing the bigger picture.

You knew things would turn out a certain way, yet…

Well, you should take pride in the fact that you tried. Time will show you how. When you look back, always keep in mind the ones who took out the time to understand you and those who called you crazy.

#2 No guidance = hidden self-guide

When people refuse to help you, guide you or direct you, take it positively. This extreme disregard for your requests to help you out might have nothing to do with you. Never take it personally. There are a billion ways to receive help. You just need to figure out the best way. Many people refrain from helping you because they don’t want to equip you with the right techniques. They fear that you would do much better because you CAN.

Always keep an eye for those who did help you or spent a minute of their busy schedule on you. They’re the ones who are secure in their life and wish the best for you till you discover your hidden self-guide.

#3 Let time entertain you but don’t be quick to judge

Never be quick to judge someone. Let people show you who they truly are, but at their expense. You shouldn’t waste a second of your precious time to figure out anyone else’s actions. Let their actions fumble so you’re sure about your opinions. Most of the time, when you refrain from judgement, you are freer. Don’t pay much heed to negativity and also give them the benefit of the doubt. You never know what value a person could add to your life even if they were mistakes that they made. 

As Carma says, “people are not all that cruel and complicated. It’s just a matter of circumstances.”

#4 Never hold on to betrayers

What would you even expect if you did? If you take betrayal seriously, that’s great. It implies that you have standards and there are specific reasons why you choose people or situations to invest yourself into. Those who betray you don’t have the power to face you. They cannot handle the enormity of you.

You’re aiming higher because that’s where you belong, don’t stoop down for those who can’t see your worth. Betrayal is unforgivable and an eye-opener at the same time. Take the latter in stride and move towards loyalty. Oh! It exists.

#5 Start playing mind games with yourself

Trick your mind into believing what you want to manifest. Your mind is the most important part of your body. It’s the director of your life. Feed it with health and positivity, that’s how you will eventually develop a powerful persona and a true sense of self.

To conclude, every New Year brings a collective new beginning. True beginnings start from within, each and every day. Make the most of the things that happen in your life. If you’re able to positively believe that a rejection is a redirection, you’re a winner!

Write your own story. Do your thing.

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Posted on in Emotions Speak

How do you talk to someone about your depressive episode?

Many a times you go through a depressive episode wherein you find yourself to be sad or upset about a situation for a prolonged period of time. It might affect your overall health, cause immense stress and altered behaviour patterns. So, what should you do in such situations? Should you talk to anyone about it?

The answer is, NO.

Yes, that’s right. Do not talk to just about anyone regarding your depressive episode. Do you really think that another human being, unqualified and going through the similar emotions or situations as you will be able to give you the perfect advice?

So what should you do?

  1. Consult a therapist/expert for your condition.

This is of prime importance! Experts are paid to listen to you, no matter how much you rant and go round the bush. They will not only listen to you but also make you realize what’s the right path and how you could change your negative patterns. The process is slow and gradual which touches the root cause of the problem and awakens something inside of you. Once you reach that point, you will realize that you are the ideal solution to your own problems.

2. Speak to your friends.

Talk to your friends about everything in life EXCEPT about your depression. If you do talk about your depressive episode, chances are they might absorb some of your negativity too and it might turn toxic instead of understanding. Divert your conversations to things you both like and engage in fun, outdoor activities. Sometimes, in the midst of nature, you might actually find your peace and home; a good relief from the weight you carry inside of you.

3. Pen down what you really think the problem is.

Most of the time you tend to get over dramatic about situations but when you actually write it down, you tend to rationalize the situation and eventually realize that it was a huge waste of time when you actually have so much more to do. So how do you find out about the things you need to do?

4. Always make a plan for the day and stick to it.

Have a plan every single day about when to exercise, when to watch a movie, when to meet a friend, when to have a night out, which book to read and what dish to cook on a Thursday night while you crave for the weekend to commence.

5. Exercise!

I cannot stress this enough but the main reason why your mind is occupied with depressive thoughts is because, you let it. Come out of this with meditative exercises. Go for a run, take that dance workout class and eat healthy at all costs. Clear your mind because that’s precisely where the toxicity lies.

And lastly,

6. Keep this phase of yours private.

Refrain from telling anybody about this depressive episode except a therapist. Chances are they will absorb it for the moment but not respect it at some point. They might start sharing similar experiences which might not help you get out of the web that your mind has created or they might simply use it against you, poke fun or talk about it and make a mess of your privacy other than respecting it.

Keep this phase of yours private. If you really want to talk about it then talk about it as an accepted part of your story. Narrate your story with pride once you have overcome the hardships. In that, lies strength and power over your situation, adding a beautiful touch of inspiration for those facing the same issues.

That’s when you realize that it was a much-needed part of your story. There is something so charming about how beautifully you accept reality!

Even after you have overcome your small battles, don’t blurt out advice to those struggling because they are probably in the early stages that you were in right at the start. And please, steer clear from phrases like, “Been there, done that” or “We’ve all gone through it”. Always advise them to consult a therapist.

None of us are pros at dealing with life. Do what’s best for you, smartly.

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Posted on in Channelize Your Thoughts

People don’t change. They just buy time.

As many chances as you tend to give a person, it is quite clear that you’re being hopeful of the inevitable. Change is constant and nothing can turn that around. But basic and primary habits or thought processes of an individual will always be a part of his/her personality. There’s nothing you can do to change that.

People don’t change. They might alter their patterns to suit you but complete change in a person is impossible and only fools oneself into believing that it’s the only way to survive.

In all honesty, how do you expect someone to completely turn around their life experiences that moulded them in a certain way to miraculously just change for your good? Would you really do the same?

A 360 degree turn for another is a trial that is sure to expire. It’s unhealthy and delays the lessons you need to learn or go through in life.

So the next time someone promises you that they’re going to change and become exactly what you want or you find yourself expecting a fish to climb a mountain, realize that either they are buying more time with no concrete assurance or you’re doing whatever you can to be utterly hopeful.

Change is inevitable, yes. But this change is a part of your evolution and growth. It shapes the person you’re ought to become in the long run. It is a healthy journey.

So it’s better to grow in life and not significantly change to suit another because firstly, it is impossible and even if it happens, don’t be fooled into the trial period that sooner or later reaches an outburst. And secondly, you’re selling away your precious time.

People don’t change. They just buy time. Let alignments do its wonders!

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